So Gone...but not too far

As you can tell I love all things Jill. Yes her whole discography is the soundtrack to my life. This song in particular. We've all had them, those relationships that you knew where wrong, but you still stayed with that person for all the wrong reasons. You know without a shadow of doubt that it's wrong, but you are attracted to that thing that makes it wrong. You try to keep it going, and then you finally "wake up". No, actually you start losing meaningful things around you, that when you wake up. It doesn't always have to be a relationship, it could be an addiction, a job, etc. We let certain things take over our lives that just shouldn't. We get so consumed with the feeling it gives us that we don't think about the consequences. The woman that loves that man that dogs her, never realizes the toll it takes on her self esteem. The drug addict never sees the relationships her addiction has destroyed. It's funny how we can let certain things distract us and get us off course. But the great thing about it is, when you wake up you can usually get back to  life as normal. You may have a couple of bridges to mend but it helps you grow as a person.

The dreaded Mondays

I despise Mondays!!! I don't know why but I really can't get with the program. Mondays are the bane of my existence....ok maybe that 's too far. I just really don't think we should work on Mondays. As a coach I have to work on weekends so the things that normal people get done on Saturdays or Sundays (I go to church on Sundays) I don't. I need one extra day to catch up. So today I feel like writing to Congress and the White House to see if we can officially have three day weekends. For all of us that truly work 6 day work weeks, please just give us a break so we can get rid of our Monday Blues.

Making a conscience effort to grow up

Today our Bishop taught from 1 Peter 1:3-10. Basically Peter was writing  to tell the church that salvation was not enough to change them. They have to be actively involved in the change. This subject got my gears to grinding. It helped me to understand why some people are in certain situations. They expect others to help them grow up and mature instead of making a conscience effort to do it themselves. So many people feel it's others responsibility to help them grow and to mature, this is where the "helpless mentality" comes from. "I can't do it because no one has been there for me" or "I can't do it because no one ever taught me". How about you take control and you teach yourself. The time for being helpless and ignorant is gone. There are too many resources out there to help you get on your feet.

The American culture speaks of "pulling yourself up by your boot straps" yet we continue to let people abuse the systems put in place to help the ones that WANT to help themselves. My people, my people!!! Stop blaming everyone else and start doing. You will perish from lack of knowledge. Life will pass you by. Stand up and fight for your right to exist and not only exist but to be fruitful and multiply (not talking about having kids, but about having success in life). No more can you stand by and expect someone else to do it for you, the time is now. Stepup to the plate and get it done. Think about it, you are the only one that can do the job that you were meant to do. That should make you feel special, no one else can do it like you can. If God meant for someone else to do it, it would have been done by now. He's waiting on you. TAKE CONTROL!!! GROW UP and MATURE.

Stop wallowing in self-pity, it's a trap from the enemy. Notice this: those who always linger in self pity, usually have nothing going for them. They are miserable human beings who suffer from an addiction (doesn't have to be drugs either) and talk about the some thing that happened 15 years ago. Don't be that person, live in the now. If there is a quality that you don't have, add it. Peter said "and to this add", which means you can tack it on. You can't sew, add! You can't do math, practice and add! You can't read, add!! There are no more excuses.

This may seem like a rant, but as an educator, I see a helpless mentality all over our kids. They feel things should be handed to them and if it's not done for them then they can't/won't do it. What kind future will they have with this mentality? I can tell you another welfare generation that always looks for hand outs!!! Can't have it and won't tolerate it. So if you see me sternly leading a child in the right direction, don't tell me I'm being too rough. Chances are you are one of the people that need to mature a little more to get to the level where you can lead.

Another day, another.............

This song is definitely describing my life at the moment. It's moving at such a fast pace that I feel as though I have no one to run to. It's not even about having a man, it's just about having someone to give me comfort, or to pat me on the back and say you're okay, or just to give me that reassuring hug that helps you relax and all the troubles go away. Yes my family does that, but they have their own "cares of the world". I guess just being this for everyone else is killing me. I'm really not trying to but some times I feel as though I'm holding the world together for everyone else. Right now I'm at the point where I'm looking at God and screaming out HELLLLPPPP at the top of my lungs and nothing is being done. I'm tired of my job, I'm tired of coaching, I'm tired of being the rock. Maybe this is the point where God wants me to be. I feel He keeps telling me "Girl, it's not your job to keep the world going, that's MY JOB", but I keep doing the same exact thing. One day I'll learn, but until then I will keep asking God for help and energy to push me through.

Never let.....

Here's a couple of never let statements that usually help me out in life:

Never let someone make you feel sorry for who you are.

•     It's the way God made you, as long as you aren't doing the things that are opposite of God's will for your life then you are okay. 

Never let anyone violate your right to live

• you have a right to exist and be, never let anyone threaten that through physical or mental violence

Never give up more than you can afford

• people in this world will take from you until you have nothing left. never let this happen always make sure your star player (that's you) is taken care of. 

Never stay in a place that makes you unhappy

• having an unhappy life leads to unhappy, unhealthy behaviors. When you start feeling like this take steps to make sure you are going to be happy, not just in the short term but also in the long run. 

Never let someone dictate the way you look

• DO WHAT YOU WANT TO DO!!! If you want to wear your hair natural do it. If you want green fingernails , do it. If you like to wear purple do it!!! Just make sure it's neat and acceptable (you don't want to lose your job). But do things that make you feel great (once again have to be in God's will) and you won't have to deal with having a dreadful life. 

I have more but these are the only ones I could think of at the moment. God never desired for your life to be miserable. So if you see it going in that direction, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!! 

Love you like I love myself 

Finally Gone

So he has finally let me go. The one who keeps popping in and out of my life every three years. I'm hoping this time it's permanent. I can't take the roller coaster. I'm finally ready to get off and enjoy real love. Not the conditional crap he used to push me. The "if you do something I don't like then it's over" type love, never mind I was willing to give up everything for him. He could never see that. He was too busy trying to keep himself wrapped in the enigma of "HIM". To busy trying to keep others out that he never truly let me in, and now it's finally over. I'm free to be me and enjoy love with someone who actually cares. With someone who really knows me and accepts me for who I am. No more waiting and hoping, no more wishing and praying. I actually prayed and told God if it wasn't his will to cut it off. I'm happy to say today, at this moment, I exhaled a sigh of relief and release. Life is great!!!